relo_worries

Going to do this tonight. This is a great idea. Thank you

Great perspective - really interesting to hear from someone who has been on the other side and it didn't work out (initially)

Thanks for sharing

I'd be the primary earner initially, but she works in tech as well so shouldn't have problem finding work.

Definitely will be using temporary/exploration angle in my sales pitch to her :)

I have considered proposing. Was even planning on setting up a surprise once we moved in. Then this offer across the country came up and turned everything upside down.

I'd still do it in a heartbeat, but don't want her to think I'm proposing just to lure her across the country

Age is a great point. I'm 30. I think back on previous relationships and it sounds like an easy decision to take the job. This relationship, with this girl, not so much.

My dream scenario is i keep the job and the girl, so I need to find a way to make that happen

When you were moving to Germany, how much did your partner not want to go as well? Did it take a lot of convincing? How did you structure your discussions?

Thanks for your input though. Helpful to know others out there have been in similar situations.

That's actually one of her big concerns. We were planning on moving in, but still haven't lived together. Now I'm asking her to quit her job and move across the country, without a job, to live with me. So I understand where she is coming from.

It's a tough spot indeed. I've got some time to think it over or sell her on it. Thanks for replying - this is a super tough spot for me and I appreciate your input

Thanks - that's largely been my thought process as well as I think things over. I just want to make sure that if I do pass, I maintain a good relationship with the company to keep future opportunities open. I've never actually declined an offer before, so it's all new territory for me.