throwaway9er

I like this. Thank you!

American residing in US

It's a thought experiment. Assuming I haven't travelled in years and may not be able to again. Decadence was not the goal, as is neither spending or wasting all the money unnecessarily. It's the classic pickle, stay in a few places for a long time or barely get to know/appreciate multiple. Honestly looking for ideas I can expand on...

Yes, well said, thanks. Also "Depression talk" is not you, which is difficult to internalize in the moment.

Yes, depression is usually not about the money, but personal issues. My hardest days personally have been when things were going well and best were when I was unable to keep the lights on/pay bills. When the business was almost failing I had my significant other with me 24/7. After I ruined the most important relationship in my life, the business improved dramatically and I was mentally in a far worse place.

I would happily leave the company to get her back or undo losing her. That's what people don't understand, you're an entrepreneur for the journey not the money (even if only subconsciously). Thus, people shouldn't assume there are money/ startup problems when someone is depressed.

As a founder who struggles with severe depression, one of the few bits of advice that I remember when personally in a dark place is from a physician that had met with thousands of suicidal patients. He said:

"I've never had a patient who survived (suicidal thinking) and later wished that they had killed themselves."

Sorry I couldn't find the quote and may be paraphrasing a bit, I share this because this personal mantra has kept me from the ledge when my thoughts were otherwise debilitating.