leinkasorafkt

Thank you,

I agree that it'd be absolutely gruelling if I were to walk into the new office 5 months from now and realize it was a terrible mistake. The counter offer is a sure thing and has better TC.

1) They were already "overextending" their generosity when I got the 95% offer of my current pay and they said that was as much I could realistically get

It does not bode well for future pay rises to be honest, but it felt somewhat good that they went beyond what one normally would get for me personally.

2) Not sure, I myself have always had sympathy with others if they were leaving a job, or understood if they decided to not join on account of a great counter-offer. This is probably easier as an IC. Feels bad to taint oneself on account of money, but it's the entire package that's enticing now, not just the extra take-home pay every month.

3) If I was sure it'd be fulfilling I think I could make do with 30% less. Right now I can do normal weeks (9-5 every day) and work at a leisurely pace and sometimes from a home office.

4) It would have been a comfortable job where I could probably make do for 10 years into the future without really expanding my horizons. That does sound scary though, at some point being 50 and knowing I missed out on a "better" career.

definitely. those hours are worth a lot. thanks for the reply :)

i like people, but being somewhat meek and amicable i can only deal with people who are somewhat like myself in terms of affinity money is important, but i would hate to work 50 hours versus 40 to "make up" for what i lose in pay what's most important to me is personal/professional satisfaction in terms of delivering value to customers though finding the unity/trinity in which everything meshes well is tricky..

this sounds like a good suggestion.

who knows, airfares could easily double or triple in the next few years, might as well spend some time vacationing now.

i will try this, but it's difficult.

for me, to re-establish myself at a new company is like 90% of the battle. even a 10% pay increase wouldn't really be worth that monumental task.

thanks for the suggestions!

i think i have no legible way of asserting myself, alas. he is a better developer than me, more liked by upper leadership and has a way with words that escapes me.

this coworker was succesful a few years ago in having our former very well-liked and professional project/scrum master thrown out of the team after they had several arguments.

he is comfortable to have around for upper management because he gets things done, only it has to be done his way.

to me it's a case of at some point giving someone a fingertip and eventually the entire hand and arm will be taken.

it basically boiled down to that the project manager felt he wasn't actually in charge of direction or leadership. the jira board would suddenly change without there having been consensus about it, or he would unilaterally have meetings with key stakeholders without inviting this project manager.

i think it hurts more for project leader types to be talked over or go uninvited to meetings than an IC, or maybe i have just gotten used to it

interesting perspective. i agree with you, i need to work on how i handle the workplace.

through 15 years i have only had 2 managers. we meet maybe once every 2 months and have sit-downs every half-year/9 months for talking about goals, salary adjustment purposes or if i want to attend a conference or course or such.

i am very easy to handle for managers in that i rarely need 1:1s or have many requirements. i am also hardly ever sick, it's been a few years since i took sick leave or a mental health day.

that would be horrendous yes!

i have a private office now and this potential one has an open plan environment, but is also more work-from-home friendly.

you are right in that it's not bad, just different from when i started and maybe i'm less adaptable than i thought and not cut out for this "new" agile world.

i think fewer standups would be good. maybe if it were a "walk-the-board" kind of format i'd appreciate it more.

i'm just feeling that if my contributions become less visible i'll at some point get "found out" as someone who just collects paycheques and never delivers. my manager doesn't read git commits or knows who had novel idea x, y, z.

maybe i am way too invested in work and should find other outlets.

thanks for the reply!

i agree that there will always be things to dislike in any company. agile is ramping up hard in the company i work for and guess everyone's adapting in his or her own way..

the lower-salary job is less invested in standups/sprints and the like, and smaller overall, so i think there'd be less micro-management, but again, working 200 hours overtime a year (that's 1.5~ months extra) just to get back to the previous paycheque is a tough call.

Update. I took the new office and it was everything i dreamt it could be!

Thanks for answering!

I think I just generally dislike change, whether it's for the good or bad.

For instance, maybe the new office will have more noise from cars.

Noise-cancelling headphones make a difference, truly, but they are tough on the ears to use all day every day, and don't entirely block out voices when they are 1-2m away, alas.