I have a very good friend who is struggling with mental health as well and his situation started to become worse since Covid-19.
As others already commented, please ASAP reach out to a professional. I don't know where you live, but I am very sure such a hotline exists pretty close to you.
My friend called such a hotline and he got help and he is better now.
I know this is a huge step to take, but reaching out will help and it is professionals taking care and they know what they do.
Whatever your circumstances are, someone will pick you up again.
Please call; there is no reason to feel embarrassed for whatever.
PS: I've been reading HN for years now and never commented here, but I just signed up now to reach out to you.
As others already commented, please ASAP reach out to a professional. I don't know where you live, but I am very sure such a hotline exists pretty close to you.
My friend called such a hotline and he got help and he is better now.
I know this is a huge step to take, but reaching out will help and it is professionals taking care and they know what they do.
Whatever your circumstances are, someone will pick you up again.
Please call; there is no reason to feel embarrassed for whatever.
PS: I've been reading HN for years now and never commented here, but I just signed up now to reach out to you.