I was like this, to an extent, as well in my early twenties. What I realized was that I _didn't_ want to be like this, and like anything - it takes practice.
I consider myself smarter than the average Joe off the street, and you do too. Otherwise you wouldn't be reading HN :) So social cues, reading a crowd, and being engaging, it all takes practice. Yes, some people develop this naturally and don't need to consciously practice, but others don't. So just like programming, stop saying "No, I just don't get it", and instead reason why you don't and next time nail it.
I consider myself smarter than the average Joe off the street, and you do too. Otherwise you wouldn't be reading HN :) So social cues, reading a crowd, and being engaging, it all takes practice. Yes, some people develop this naturally and don't need to consciously practice, but others don't. So just like programming, stop saying "No, I just don't get it", and instead reason why you don't and next time nail it.