spectralfriend

> nowadays most people in my country would say "we are all somewhat autistic in some way or another

Careful with this. In small amounts it can be good -- recognizing that autistic traits are human traits and we should recognize each others humanity -- but in large amounts it is regularly used to deny autistic people experiences. Like, "it's not so bad. It's not a disability. We're all a little autistic." Etc.

As a diagnosed autistic, I think I would ask -- does ticking these boxes make you feel like, "oh shit, this could explain some difficulties..." or just go, "huh, interesting?"

I tend to invite people to think about how their lives have been impacted. For example, I experience anxiety at late invites to events I'd enjoy. I panic and decline them because I'm experiencing a highly irrational anger fear response to changing schedules. This causes me to miss events I would otherwise enjoy, and then I feel guilty. Having to process all those feelings takes a lot of energy, and it's really draining. That has significant impact on my life.

Compare to a friend of mine who just prefers quiet evenings. She declines things all the time but never gives it a second thought.

Disability vs preference. It's ok if it's either! Neither of us are wrong, we just experience different impacts in our lives.

I'm autistic and the difficulty was high for me to learn, "being autistic is no excuse for also being an asshole". I had to work a little harder, sure, but it's doable for many of us.

Regarding your last sentence, typically when the individual seeks it. It's generally considered both rude and ineffective to diagnose others who are not seeking diagnosis.

Do you think neurotypical people often go, "I would like to spend significant time and money to get an autism diagnosis"?

I don't think it's particularly common. When I went through my dx, I was really hoping for adhd because then I could get meds, but my doc and all my screenings were like, "definitely not adhd, definitely autism".

So, maybe you are seeing rising diagnosis rates and considering that too easy? If encourage you to think about why you feel this way.