{"by":"fatdog789","dead":true,"id":1147034,"parent":1146976,"text":"1. I use forms but charge you as if I did it from scratch.

BULLSHIT. You pay for a lawyer's time and talents. Using a form means less time, which means you pay less. It also means that you're using a document which was successful in the past. Let's put it this way: do you want your lawyer to try a novel legal document just for you, or do you want him to use the one that has survived the fires of litigation?

2. I hand off work to peons but charge you a lawyer’s rate.

That's illegal in every state. A lawyer cannot pass off non-lawyer's work as the product of lawyers. They can charge you a lawyer's rate for that work though, iff you agree to something that stupid.

3. My Ivy League education doesn’t make me a better lawyer.

True. Look at Bush.

4. I hope you don’t look too closely at the expense report.

Firms don't charge their clients for fixed overhead in expense reports. It comes out of the exorbitant hourly rates they charge (at large firms) or is swallowed by the firm as the cost of doing business (small-mid firms).\nHere's a hint for your bullshit meter: the \"source\" doesn't work for a law firm.

5. You don’t really need me.

For any situation where you wouldn't normally need a lawyer, this is true. For any other situation, you can bet your ass that as soon as the shit hits the fan, the other side will have a lawyer.

6. My fee is negotiable.

Lawyers are required by ethical regulations to disclose their fees (and the negotiability) of those fees. At least they are in CA, OH, PA, NY, NJ, and TX.

7. You’re always on the clock.

You're only on the clock if you're discussing legal representation (advice, case status, etc). If your lawyer is billing you for chit chat, find another lawyer, and file a complaint with the bar. Lawyers are only allowed to charge you for actual work, and that's true in every state.

Lawyers are also only allowed to bill you for actual time put in to your case.

8. I don’t know much about the law.

A lawyer is required to disclose this to you. If he didn't, file an ethical complaint. If the violation (lack of knowledge is serious enough), he will get suspended or disbarred.

9. I don’t refer you to the best lawyers.

Bullshit. Lawyers depend on clients for referrals more than on referrals from other lawyers. If they refer you to a bad lawyer, they won't get your repeat business.

11. I don’t have to tell you how I screwed up in the past.

They do if you ask them.

12. I put on a tough act but that won’t actually help your case.

Depends on the situation on whether this is desired. You don't want a tough act for contract negotiations, but you do want a tough act for settlement negotiations.

13. Mediation might be the better choice.

This should be obvious. Your lawyer shouldn't need to tell you this. Getting along is always better than fighting.

15. I’m training junior attorneys on your dime.

This is true in a \"biglaw\" firm, and only in a biglaw firm. Its also true that firms discount the time charged by lawyers in training.

16. I’m a dime a dozen.

Most law school graduates drop out of the field by the 3rd year after graduation.","time":1266976453,"type":"comment"}