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Isn't the solution to just share an email address?

And UK visitors to the site don't even get any ads.

Doesn't AlertManager evaluate metrics and fire alerts?

A quick look at OnCall suggests it is more for managing fired alerts than firing alerts.

Their own screenshot has AlertManager as an alert source.

Do many companies ask for birth certificates?

How are you achieving the ANPR? I'd have thought that would add a fairly significant cost.