EvanK
Joined 17 years ago
Joined 17 years ago
Welcome to the ranks. I always value one more person in this field that is driven to build something of quality.
Step 2: Find people like you. Look on Meetup.com for groups of people with shyness or social anxiety. You'd be surprised how comfortable you can be in a group when you know everyone else in the group has the same irrational fear of social situations.
Two simple steps and, given time, you'll feel better and even start becoming more outgoing. You won't turn into an extrovert, but it's all a game of inches.
I also find that, in small and controlled doses AND ONLY IF YOU HAVE LOTS OF SELF CONTROL, social lubricants like alcohol or marijuana can also help to overcome social anxiety. Your mileage may vary, so always err on the side of caution and avoid anything of that nature that you don't KNOW for a fact that you can keep yourself in control of.
Work has never been my purpose in life so much as a means to an end. I've never been a "drone" so much as a wanderer that has stopped to warm his hands by the fire of a camp. If/when I don't like what I do anymore, I will simply cease to do it and wander on to the next thing. There is always a way to survive, though it may not always be obvious (and sometimes may not even be legal.)
At some point, many people find a person or group of people that they decide to center their life around, and put down lasting ties, and there is absolutely nothing wrong with that. But that kind of life does require more planning and forethought, and often a lot more concessions to their own personal wants and needs. If you're fine with that and what you get in return (family and friends), then you never become a drone. If you're not fine with that, then you have to decide what it is that you DO want, and go after it.
speaking as someone who DID get in a lot of fights growing up, the "it lets me know I'm still alive" thing is ridiculous; there are so many ways to enjoy life without beating the shit out of someone or having someone beat the shit out of you.
take up martial arts, or rock climbing, or an actual sport.
I eat ramen every once in a while, when I'm too busy or too tired to fix any better kind of meal for myself, but that doesn't put me at any kind of risk because I don't do it every day for every meal. If you live entirely on ANY one kind of food (ramen, hot pockets, tuna sandwiches, etc), you're going to have health problems because you're simply not getting the different kinds of nutrition your body needs.
That said, once they ask you to stop, it's the decent ethical thing to simply stop :)