First: If you can't even start something, no amount of "connections" will do you any good whatsoever. But it sure is nice to fantasize that if you were somewhere else, it'd be easy. (It wouldn't be.) That's one insidious kind of excuse.
Your whole posts makes it sound like you're making excuses instead of actually trying to change.
Asking for advice from strangers is not really taking a step, is it? You're putting your salvation in their hands. There's no guarantee you'll get a single useful response. And if you don't, what will your natural reaction be? To go "OH well, same thing again"?
You're giving up power, instead of taking it.
Which sounds like your core problem.
How can you take power, take control?
Your whole posts makes it sound like you're making excuses instead of actually trying to change.
Asking for advice from strangers is not really taking a step, is it? You're putting your salvation in their hands. There's no guarantee you'll get a single useful response. And if you don't, what will your natural reaction be? To go "OH well, same thing again"?
You're giving up power, instead of taking it.
Which sounds like your core problem.
How can you take power, take control?