I can see what this is reaching for
---
but the presentation is just... tedious.
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inscrutable
---
insufficient payoff for the patience it requires of the reader
---
I gave up half way down the page.
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There just isn't enough continuity to these little nibbles of narrative
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Sometimes things are explained
---
explained with citations even
---
other times they're just thrown out with no explanation whatsoever
---
or a wink and a nod, utterly impenetrable to those not in the know
---
and no sense of what's important to pay attention to, and what can safely be glanced past.
---
Could really use some workshopping.
---
but the presentation is just... tedious.
---
inscrutable
---
insufficient payoff for the patience it requires of the reader
---
I gave up half way down the page.
---
There just isn't enough continuity to these little nibbles of narrative
---
Sometimes things are explained
---
explained with citations even
---
other times they're just thrown out with no explanation whatsoever
---
or a wink and a nod, utterly impenetrable to those not in the know
---
and no sense of what's important to pay attention to, and what can safely be glanced past.
---
Could really use some workshopping.