If possible, try to spend more time with people who espouse these desired characteristics and less time with those who don't.
Finally, conversation should be...fun...if possible. If you hack your way to being 100% in control of things all the time, then how much fun is that going to be for others?
Non-violent communication is a very structured approach to guiding people through perceived difficult behaviour: https://www.clearerthinking.org/post/2019/03/06/Want-to-impr...
Gain a little understanding about the give and take of communication: https://experimentalhistory.substack.com/p/good-conversation...
If possible, try to spend more time with people who espouse these desired characteristics and less time with those who don't.
Finally, conversation should be...fun...if possible. If you hack your way to being 100% in control of things all the time, then how much fun is that going to be for others?