Indeed, this is why I won't use it either. I settled on Slack's Nebula [0] instead of wireguard because it handles direct p2p communication between nodes automatically.
There also exists an open source implementation of the tailscale control server [1] that you could self host.
There also exists an open source implementation of the tailscale control server [1] that you could self host.
[0] https://github.com/slackhq/nebula
[1] https://github.com/juanfont/headscale