Comment by azundo

I had a similar realization after reading Radical Compassion by Tara Brach. The concept of the two darts of suffering in Buddhism has also been extremely valuable to me. The first dart is the immediate pain (laundry didn't get done) and the second dart is the self-inflicted pain caused by the stories we tell to ourselves ("I can't even get a simple load of laundry done, I am a terrible person who will never accomplish anything.") It's usually the second dart that causes the most suffering despite being entirely created in our own heads and self inflicted.