I'm not sure I can phrase this in a sufficiently nuanced manner, but .. how much of this nuance is achieved by having discussions about issues which have real life-or-death impacts on people but without having any of those people inconveniently present? You can have a discussion about racism among white people, a discussion about trans people with no trans people present, a discussion about accessibility with no disabled people involved; and so on. It sounds nuanced but only because it's an academic exercise to those involved, not something with real impact on their lives.
The slogan "nothing about us without us" has been used a lot for this recently, but it has a much older history: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nothing_About_Us_Without_Us