"I have no evidence X happened": "I did it and destroyed the evidence"
"I can't remember doing X": "I did it and can't destroy the evidence"
In other words: If you catch up to me with actual evidence, I'm proven not to lie (note that in several jurisdictions, lying might be illegal, especially as a witness).
There's nothing quite like corpspeak, just my favorite:
"I'm planning to have more time with my family": "The investors or my cofounder fired me"
"I have no evidence X happened": "I did it and destroyed the evidence"
"I can't remember doing X": "I did it and can't destroy the evidence"
In other words: If you catch up to me with actual evidence, I'm proven not to lie (note that in several jurisdictions, lying might be illegal, especially as a witness).
There's nothing quite like corpspeak, just my favorite:
"I'm planning to have more time with my family": "The investors or my cofounder fired me"