Just want to add that I had a somewhat similar experience under the influence of THC (I had several edibles). I took away much the same 'revelation' of the true existential terror of 'oneness'. I felt like I was stuck in a 'perception loop' where I (and all of the world) was in an infinite self-referential loop and I was identical to that loop. The true terror came from me trying to 'break out' of the loop, and being unable to. I remember continually asking the question 'who perceives the perceiver?' and then reaching for an answer, only to be kicked 'up a level' in this recursive loop and starting the process all over again. Eventually I was overwhelmed by a Sisyphean resignation; I was condemned to exist in this loop for all time, continually confused, with nothing to ground 'myself' and in a constant battle against 'myself'.
Looking back, the feeling of being 'trapped' was somewhat reminiscent of my experience of 'sleep paralysis' (and also occurred as I was falling asleep) though on an ineffably more terrifying scale. I'm not sure if other people who've experienced bad trips on weed (that are hallucinogenic in nature) have felt something similar.
When I awoke the next day, I suddenly had the distinct realization that the existence of other living beings and their eventual death (as my own) was an immense gift. Eternal existence as some monistic 'God' suddenly appeared to be the ultimate hell.
Looking back, the feeling of being 'trapped' was somewhat reminiscent of my experience of 'sleep paralysis' (and also occurred as I was falling asleep) though on an ineffably more terrifying scale. I'm not sure if other people who've experienced bad trips on weed (that are hallucinogenic in nature) have felt something similar.
When I awoke the next day, I suddenly had the distinct realization that the existence of other living beings and their eventual death (as my own) was an immense gift. Eternal existence as some monistic 'God' suddenly appeared to be the ultimate hell.