They are mostly nonsense because they're not actually effective, and they've been proven ineffective in empirical tests- mixed fights with little to no rulesets. If you attempted to use Kung Fu to defend yourself against an 'unavoidable situation', you'd very likely lose. Testing in realistic situations- the point of the Deadspin article- is that MMA & its constituent martial arts (Muay Thai, boxing etc.) are what's actually effective. (Did you read the article?)
It's like comparing the 'four humours' vs. modern medicine
It's like comparing the 'four humours' vs. modern medicine