One way might be to split envy in to:
Covetousness
Resentment
Sadness
(Maybe ambition?)
Covetousness is really, really, bad. It will eat your soul. It is the desire to take what someone else has for yourself. “I want his car.” “I want his girlfriend.”
Resentment can be useful for a short term, but will eat you and cause bitterness if it festers. “I am not paid what I’m worth, I can get better elsewhere.” Is a useful statement if it is accurate and you act on it. But if you are lying to yourself or if you don’t act, it turns bad.
Sadness is a normal human emotion when things just aren’t how you hoped they were.
Ambition is the (mostly healthy within limits) impetus to achieve more. “I want a boyfriend who is nice the way his is.” “I want an even cooler car than anyone I know.” As long as you remain healthy and within your ethical system, ambition is good.
I think maybe taking a frustrating emotion like envy and reframing it with component parts can help you approach it differently?
Just an idea.
Covetousness Resentment Sadness (Maybe ambition?)
Covetousness is really, really, bad. It will eat your soul. It is the desire to take what someone else has for yourself. “I want his car.” “I want his girlfriend.”
Resentment can be useful for a short term, but will eat you and cause bitterness if it festers. “I am not paid what I’m worth, I can get better elsewhere.” Is a useful statement if it is accurate and you act on it. But if you are lying to yourself or if you don’t act, it turns bad.
Sadness is a normal human emotion when things just aren’t how you hoped they were.
Ambition is the (mostly healthy within limits) impetus to achieve more. “I want a boyfriend who is nice the way his is.” “I want an even cooler car than anyone I know.” As long as you remain healthy and within your ethical system, ambition is good.
I think maybe taking a frustrating emotion like envy and reframing it with component parts can help you approach it differently?
Just an idea.