Ask HN: How can you use Stack Exchange without throwing up?

So I had a Stack Exchange account years ago but I quickly realized that the balkanization was throwing me off. It's so pervasive it's actually an UX problem (account management for example).

Also I found the tone condescending and the process opaque.

But since there are (many) actual users on this network I wonder if I'm seeing this wrong and how you could actually make it work for yourself.